Its that time of the year when the holiday season kicks off in earnest and we start to feel the ripping effect of having our hard earned cash stolen..no...mugged from us as soon as we leave the house.

As we go down the Motorway, oh dear we need a little more petrol so theres a Service Station......to find that petrol on these sites is about 10p a litre MORE than your local one! Why ? Because the thieving bastards know you have no choice. So then you walk in to get a coffee and a sandwich.....a friend and I returned very late from a trip to Amsterdam and pulled into a mWay service station at Cannock (South Bound ) to be charged £17.60 for 2 coffees and 2 stale rolls! Dont these half wits realise that once bitten people will not go there again ? I suppose not.

But......worse is to come! The Airport arrives! short term or long term parking ? Hmm lets see Short term parking..... Only £120 for 5 days! wow what a bargain! Mugged again! Its best to park close to the airport at a normal car park and get a taxi to the airport and leave these thieving bastards to rot in their own car parks where sometimes you come back and find your car has been broken into anyway. And when you complain out comes a surly Gorilla saying they are not responsible unless you took out the extortionate charge for Insurance ! oh and by the way......if you are just a few minutes late to collect your car...they are further astronomical charges to pay!

After that you enter the Airport and the first place to get you spanked badly is the customs and passport control....if you have any water ( or any liquid over 100cc) they confiscate it ! But guess what ......you can buy it again once you go through customs at an extortionate price compared to what you pay in the high street! I am sure Customs must flog these bottles back to the retailers afterwards! This of course is in the interests of Safety! Bloody bollocks! Just another excuse to make you feel shitty before you leave the country.

Take some empty bottles next time and fill them up in the loos!

Bring plenty of food from home with you so that you dont pay £15 for a ham roll! ( That has been on display for 2 weeks usually) served up by a rude unwashed freak who graduated from charm school at Borstal. Even the well known retailers like M&S and others DOUBLE the price of sandwiches and edible commodities here.....another place where you have no choice... so dont buy it! Take your own sandwiches with you. Once the turnover drops considerably, they may learn their lesson....but I dont think so as greed is paramount.

AAhh now to Duty Free! Yummy! Some bargains to be had you think ? NO not at all...dont forget its duty free but not profit free! In fact almost EVERY thing on sale is cheaper in one of the discount stores in your local high street rather than here. Its not like it used to be and any savings you do make is very minimal.
And make sure you take some clear plastic bags with you as the Customs & Excise are going to charge for them in future so that you can needlessly put your bottles in them for no apparent reason except to satisfy their
stupidity in thinking its for 'safety against terrorism' ! Another load of bollocks! As is taking off your shoes as whenever I have taken them off they have hardly looked at them anyway!

AAhh at last its time to check in......to find your 2 lbs over in your baggage allowance...well thats another extortionate charge heading your way! The worst is RyanAir as they charge for everything! including not having any luggage at all!

By the time you take off, the money in your pocket had already been thieved to such an extent its almost cost you the holiday!

There is a good reason the World describes us as Rip - Off Great Britain!